Originals+2


 * // "CAN'T WE COMMUNE?" OR “YOU JUST DON'T FIGURE OUT ME?” //**

**// You have most probably experienced before. You hang out for a cup of tea or coffee with your close friend and suddenly she starts to weep hysterically and utters in an impulsive way “l don’t know the reason exactly, but he just does not want to open up to me!” Or with your buddy in a café and he complains “Dude, my girlfriend can never keep her mouth and l have had enough of it” Or worse still, you could be the opposite side who cannot comprehend why his\her relationship partner has communication problems. Men and women usually communicate and react to each other in different ways during conversations. Whether you agree or not, the fact is that men and women interact and interpret matters and situations differently and this is the cause of misunderstandings, confusions and conflicts. //**   **//A man and a woman can infer totally irrelevant conclusions from the same talk, as they have almost different ways of conversation with different perspectives. Moreover if they cannot properly understand and pick out what is the main topic, these different perspectives can cause dissatisfaction in one or both partners and can lead to misunderstanding, exasperation, or even to vexation. In order to better understand the reason why couples generally perceive that //****//their spouse doesn’t understand them, it is crucial to know the source of the problem, namely the fundamental communication differences between men and women. //**   //A story about a married couple to make the situation better understood: // **When the husband returned from work, he realized that his wife was very upset. However, he typically detected that as a general situation at first. Thus, he did not ask about what was wrong with her. Only if the woman’s grief lasted long, the man could comprehend the seriousness of the incident. **   **-Hello! **   **The women did not seem well. With a sour-faced, she had been as if screaming “I am not fine and I am bored shitless!” ** **-Hi! **   **In spite of his wife’s condition the man did not gave the message immediately that he realized her sadness during this meeting. This was a negative attitude for the woman. However, he did not give up and decided to mean the negativity more significantly to her husband. She answered his questions with only a few words: ** **-Ouch, how was the day? **   **-Well, a bit tiring. **   **-Hmm, I see! **   **In the meantime, the wife waited for the same question as she wanted to explain all the things that made her upset. However, the man was totally blockhead and did not think of asking: ** **-Where are the children? **   **-Where can be they?! (If the woman starts to answer likewise, it is the sign of her nervousness.) She said: ** **-They are in their rooms. (Her answer was full of implication. In fact, she wanted to say: “Hey man! Look at me! Can’t you see my sadness? You already know where they are! Why are you still asking them instead of me?) ** **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">-Well, what about their assignments? They have finished? **   **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">-How do you expect me to know that? While I was so busy with other things, how I could take care of them! (Here, the answer that is the implication of not knowing means that the man asks wrong questions. He should have asked the situation of her. And again, answer is the sign of some events that affected the woman badly during daytime.) ** **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;"> After at least half an hour, the wife became completely hopeless at a good conversation. By the way, her reaction against husband was going on. At first, she had been enthusiastic to tell all the things if her husband had asked. However, her desire to explain the incidents started to vanish, as the time passed. Table was prepared for dining. **   **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">“Which dish is this?” ** **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">“What does it look like?”(This answer of woman means that the man was asking all the unnecessary questions and wife was getting angry more.) ** **<span style="color: #943634; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">The husband was doubtful about tasting the meal that was not familiar to him as men generally do not want to give up habits, especially about food. However, women are more open to innovation and diversity. As a result, they want to share this kind of experiments with her husband and children. The husband did not eat the dining and preferred going outside to eat in a restaurant. When he returned home, all the things was scattered everywhere. Moreover, his wife had left the house... **   **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Unfortunately, the story ended up gloomy because of the communication differences that cause some problems, between the man and the woman. But, what are those differences? //** ====  · // Talking about troubles is the integral part of connection for women, while men speak of troubles only for an advice. That is to say, men do never mention problems unless they search for solution. However, this is the //// establishment for a certain kind of intimacy according to females. // ====
 * **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Firstly, most women love to describe any event with great detail, while men just want the bottom line. //**
 * **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Women usually choose the devious ways to describe the events. That’s to say, instead of telling directly, they prefer implication. Talking is an art for them. However, the vast majority men perceive talking only as a trouble telling method and avoid talking with fancy sentences. //**
 * **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Conversation for males is a way to preserve their independence, while for woman it is a bridge for closeness and intimacy among people. //**
 * **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Males generally focus on the main topic of the events and want to show their intellect while commenting on those, but females are interested in details and react with emotions. //**
 * **//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Consequently, we can easily conclude that //****//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">men and women THINK, SPEAK and DECIDE considerably in different ways. //**

· // In conversation, women esteem so much for emotions, feelings but, men tend to have much simpler conversation. So it is much more difficult to understand what a woman talk about. //
**//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">Communication problem between genders has been a //****//<span style="color: #4f6228; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 20pt;">problem ever since the creation of mankind. From those times to these days, this has been the subject of many literary monuments. However, they differ from each other even in poems. Here are the perfect examples of those. //**

<span style="display: block; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt; text-align: left;">A WOMAN’S POEM: **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">Every night, before I hit the hay, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">With all my heart, I pray for a man, who is not a cad, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">One who is handsome, wise, strong and listen long whatever I say, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">One who considers each detail before talking, with attention as I pay, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">Not idle, but he is profitably employed and buy everything without nay, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">Pulls up my chair and arrange everything on my way, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">Wants to stay with me all the time even if I send him away, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">God! Send me a hero, who is sweet on me, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">And knows how to react my coquetry, ** **<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 18pt;">Ooh! I pray for a man who will love me forever and deadly. **   **//<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">A MAN'S POEM: //** **//<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Always l dream a woman who has not ability to speak, //** **//<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Sacrifice all things she has, to make me reach the peak, //** **//<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">A female who enjoys having sex every time I need, //** **//<span style="color: #c00000; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">And a heroin like my mum devoted her life only to cooking. //**  **<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">These poems exemplify the differences of thinking way between genders excellently, don’t you also consider so? Thanks to these poems, it is easy to see that the fundamental cause for battle among the sexes is this vastly different way of communicating. Perhaps if women stopped trying to get men to communicate like themselves and men put a stop to expecting women to talk like themselves, they could easily comprehend the world of each other in a wonderful way. Nevertheless life would be pretty boring if men and women were the same. Believe me this communication gap is worth-experiencing. **Viva la difference**! What a challenging way to learn about life and each other. Note that you can enjoy going on living in this life only with the differences. As good as it gets for today, and I am putting an end to my writing with a beautiful song lyrics. Stay with love…** //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">You are a strange trap, I cannot get off, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">How a beautiful defeat it is, I cannot resist, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">I do not enjoy lying like the imbeciles, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Or being eaten by this baleful world like idiots, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Life is beautiful only with you, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Life is special for me thanks to you, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Surely we will overcome these rainy days, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">The most beautiful dreams, the sweetest romances are beautiful only with you, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Life is worth-living only with you, only when feeling that you will always be mine // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">Life is privileged to me thanks to you, // //<span style="color: #0f243e; font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: 16pt;">It is exactly for this reason, you are my indispensable… // **//Discussion Questions ://** **// 1 ) Why men and women communicate effectively? //**

**// 2) Are there any differences between men and women while communicating? If so, what may these differences be? //**


 * // Comments for the Discussion Questions: //**